Lessons Taught, Lessons Learned?

So what is the responsibility of a parent to make sure your kid makes the right decisions (after they've come "of age.")? And what is the responsibility of a caddy to make sure his player makes the right decisions? When I’m out on the links with my kid, those two questions merge as one. On the PGA tour some caddies are part of the decision making process and influence their players decision, others are merely pack mules, carrying clubs, and raking bunkers. But even the influential ones (e.g. Bones for Mickelson, Fluff for Jim Furyk) defer to the player in the end with whom the final decision must rest.So there we were, with a ("a" not "the" as there are many) moment of truth decision upon us. There had been a few earlier, but this one was crunch time, two under with 3 holes to go and the cut likely at even par to play in the Met Am at Baltusrol. Bad drive with no clear shot to green. Do we take our medicine and punch out to fairway or try to hit high risk shot to save par. Dad’s Ten Commandments (see earlier blog) explicitly states to take medicine in this situation. Argument: If he punches out to fairway, he can still possibly get up and down for par but will certainly make no more than bogey, thus going into last two holes with one stroke to spare to make cut.And this is a special cut, 150 player field, some of the best in the area and they’re only taking eight. Halfway through the summer season, making this cut will buoy our boy immensely. It’s right there for team Luke. But he balks at my safe play suggestion... and I don’t insist. I get caught up in his delusion of hitting “the shot” and the secondary delusion that making the cut by two strokes rather than on the number, matters. It doesn't... but I'm swept away. Five minutes later, with a triple bogey on the card, we’re in desperation mode on 17 and 18 and it’s not going to work. Bad decision, cut missed. Time to move on. But it will sting for a day or two.
One day before, we were playing at The Ike Championship at Friar’s Head Country Club, which may be the most visually stunning and beautiful course I’ve ever seen… and that includes Pebble Beach and Kiawah Island (though I know there are others). We went out on day one to make the cut by playing conservative and methodical. Before the round, his competitor friends were amazed that we hadn’t come out for a practice round for such a unique golf course. A combination of logistics (course was far away and only accessible weekdays before) and the experience that practice rounds have never provided us better results, in fact to the contrary, made our first round the first time we’d seen the course. So conservative play made sense no matter what. Result: we make the cut… top 40 and ties from a field of well over a hundred competitors.
Day 2 of Ike (the afore mentioned "one day before": Now we know the course and the same plan is in play, well at least I think so, but as the day goes on, low scores by the leader start infecting our strategy. Pretty soon, we’re going for par 5’s and drivable par 4’s, attacking pins, and before long we’re picking up the inevitable bogey’s. We wind up T-29 where a top twenty was easily within reach. In golf, in order for the player to get back out there the next day, it's typical to blame something other than ones self and the likely target is the caddie... and in this case, it's a twofer... blame your caddie and your dad for the same money. Luke does not blame me, but I'm complicit. There will be another day. And more lessons to come.

After the Cut

So Pat Wilson didn’t make the cut at the US Open, but took away a world of experience, both for competitive golf and life in general. That’s what golf gives you. Every experience in life has a lesson of course (if one chooses to pay attention), but competitive golf does test strength of character in a unique way. What’s the meaning of life? What rules do we need to live by or be judged by? USGA? State or Federal Laws? God? Personal Moral Compass? Whichever you choose, moments that count to you, provide the relevant test.

Okay, I may be getting carried away here, but Tuesday the summer of local competition continues with the New Jersey State Open Qualifier. So what matters? As we hear from all the golf pundits (the Golf Channel provides background noise at the moment), Chambers Bay may be “unfair” by some standards for the US Open Championship, but in the end, no one cares. This is the venue, this is the situation, play the course! 

Over the years, we (my player and I) have had our share of bad breaks, distractions, injustice, whatever… but no one cares! Play the course, stay patient, comport yourself with dignity (or whatever version of it works for you), and post the best score you can. As you do it on the golf course, you’ll do it in life, and you’ll do it on the golf course, and you’ll do it in life…

Play the course. I mean "Play the Course." #chambersbay

It's the US Open Man!

So here's a touch of reality connecting the dreams of junior golfers, the struggles, and what can happen...

And if you're getting into the US Open this week, this might enhance the experience. Below is a link to a blog being posted to MGAGolf.org, the golf association in the NY metropolitan area. It's written by Pat Wilson, who is playing in his first US Open. Luke has played with Pat, and his younger brother Corey, a number of times in local events (yes I was on the bag). 

Last time we saw Pat was about a year ago when Luke was playing with Corey in a qualifier and Pat was caddying for his younger brother. If I've got my timeline right, Pat had turned pro recently and was playing on the Canadian and Puerto Rican tours, and wasn't having much success. He shared that the reason he was back in New Jersey was because he was a little low on money and had to come back to make some money and regroup. After that, we heard or saw that he was still struggling trying to find a game that could compete on those tours. 

And that's pretty much how it was from our perspective until he recently found his game, just in time to get through local qualifying. Last week, in New Jersey, he was one of four guys to get through Sectional Qualifying. One of those four was Lee Janzen, two time US Open champ. Now he's at Chambers Bay. The two coaches he's working with now, have also been Luke's coaches. Luke spent about 3 years with Jason Birnbaum, and a season of mental coaching with Mike Diffley, so it's easier to imagine how surreal this must be for Pat now at Chambers Bay on the eve of teeing it up for the US Open. Very cool to see it unfold... and hope for good things. Pat's a great kid. Most of them are. Check out his blog... http://www.mgagolf.org/news/2015/june/patwilson_1 (start from the bottom... the oldest posts)

A New Outlook on (Golf) Life

A year has passed… and a new outlook has emerged. The junior golfer is now 21. He's experienced more of life. He's worked. He's bought a car with his own money. He’s felt the sweet sting of romantic attachment. And he’s accepted his frailties on the golf course. And needing to maintain the satisfaction that comes with besting the field, has pointed his energies toward other pursuits: entrepreneurship, money, business prestige. 

The dream hasn’t been buried, but it has been modified. With maturity has come a new understanding of the world around him and a better understanding of his own limitations. All things may be possible, but they’re not necessarily probable. And that’s where we pick up this story. 

His golf career will no longer arc towards the PGA tour. He knows he may never have the game for that level, and more importantly never have the head. But there are still battles to wage, and victories to be had, and coupled with success and satisfaction off the golf course, he seems okay with the trade off. So the outlook is revised, the schedule will be trimmed, but the accidental caddie is not done yet.

Our story resumed last month at the same Terra Cotta Invitational. With a field that included 20 of the top 50 amateurs in the world and about 50 of the top 500, everyone had game. You could have your best game and compete but you were never going to pass the players in this field. This may have been where “we" finally decided to revise “our" goals. And it’s okay.

Now the summer season begins in the Tri-state area (NY, NJ, and CT). First up was the NJ Am Qualifier this past week. How is it that we’re not exempt in these championships? He holds the record for the lowest round in NJ Am history. Never mind, play the qualifier. Going in, we’re just looking to qualify. No point in wasting a 66 that gets reset on the first hole of the championship. Make pars. The number will be plus 4 or 5. Through 15 holes, we’re even. Can’t buy a putt as usual, but we’re cruising. It feels too comfortable. No matter, Luke will hit an approach from 80 years to an impossible lie and we’ll make bogey to shatter our complacency and derail his fluid tee shots. Going into the last hole we’re 3 over.

“What do I need on this hole dad?” Well a par would be nice, but I think even a bogey assures qualification. OK. He tees it up and drives it 280 yards out and about 120 yards left, almost missing the adjacent fairway. We arrive at our ball 200 yards from the green with trees blocking every realistic approach. I suggest putting it back in fairway and making par or bogey from there. But we’re not in “realistic” mode. “I’ll cut a hybrid around those trees.” Really? Good contact but no cut. We’re dead behind the green, behind a mound to a pin two paces on, severely downhill. OK, let’s make bogey and we should be okay.

He pulls out lob wedge, opens it wide, swings it hard, and throws it far in the air. It lands on the fringe and trickles down near the hole. Par. Plus 3. Good, figuring the cut is plus 5. Nope. The cut is plus 3. We’re on the number (again), but we’re in, "just like we planned.” 

And so begins another "stress free" summer of competition with a new perspective on golf success and failure. Wouldn’t trade it for the world.